retrospect: matilda before her face up

its like i have too many projects and not nearly enough time. sometimes you just want to stop time, so you can catch up with everything for just a little while. short of summoning a time lord, i guess i’ll just have to conjure the time from the very void itself…somehow… i’ve said this before and i’ll say it again…. i need a team of elves to help me out with some of this stuff…..either elves or a pretty goth boy that lives and breaths to do my bidding….so if you know any elves let me know. if you’re a pretty goth boy who wants to live and breath to do my bidding as trained elves, fairies  or vampire-s&m-slaves might…here are the stipulations….(most of these also apply to those of fairy or elven descent..with exception to height and age requirements).

• must be between the ages of 18-35 (of course, elves can ignore this)
• height requirements: between 5 ft 6″ and 6 ft 9″
• weight requirements: between 120-180 lbs (i like ‘em slim)
• skin requirements: smooth, perfectly pale and practically devoid of icky stuff like chest and back hair
• must have the “master skill” of being the perfect goth boy slave without lapsing into cheesy cliche’s. this is a reeeeeally tough one considering how easy it is to cheese out when you’re doing the goth-boy-emo- thing.
• hair length requirement: long hair down the back is preferred but chin length hair applicants will be considered. May even consider shorter hair by merit of magnetic charisma.
• knowledge/experience requirements: must be a master of knowing when to talk and when to shut the hell up. …must be able to understand how much cream/sugar i take in my coffee or tea, must be generally tech savvy… understand how to resize and color balance images in photoshop. other skills that would come in handy: sewing, knitting, writing, proof reading…

now this list could go on and on and on…but i know when to give something a rest!